What Should You Do with Your Family Photos and Albums After a Divorce?

Are you finding yourself staring at a box of photos after your divorce, wondering what to do next? Looking through old albums can be emotional at the best of times, but after a split in the family it can be triggering in a host of new ways – not least the practical problems they might present. Who gets to keep what? Whether you’ve been amicably separating, ‘consciously uncoupling’ or enduring a more tumultuous process, those photos — once treasured keepsakes — can feel like emotional landmines. 

The good news is that divorce no longer has to mean that anyone in the family loses their visual history. Thanks to digitising technologies there are in fact several different solutions worth considering. So, what’s the best way to handle these images in a way that’s respectful to your past, considerate to future generations and fair to both parties?

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The Emotional and Legal Landscape

According to the Office for National Statistics the overall number of divorces in England and Wales has been dropping, however it’s a statistic that paints a somewhat misleading picture. The introduction of new divorce laws, a backlog of processing post Covid 19, economic challenges, and a trend towards fewer marriages overall have all played into this figure. Regardless, and whether a couple splitting up makes it into the official divorce statistics or not, it’s still happening. What we also know is that the division of sentimental assets remains a highly charged and often contentious issue.

Many couples discover that the emotional value of their photos far outweighs any monetary worth. In fact, studies show that the division of sentimental items, including photographs, can often be more stressful than dividing finances​ (The Divorce Surgery).

Afterall, while financial and property divisions are typically covered in the divorce settlement, personal items like family photos often remain in a very grey area.

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‍Who Gets Custody Of The Memories? 

The first step in deciding what to do with your family photos is to categorise them. We advise putting them into three categories:

1. Joint Photos:
   Images of times where both partners are present, especially those with children, are often the most difficult to deal with. These photos are a shared history, and it’s important to recognise that each party has a rightful claim to these memories.
2. Individual Photos:
   These are photos where only one partner is present, perhaps from childhood. Usually, these should remain with the person depicted in the photo.
3. Ancestral Photos:
   Older pictures of parents, grandparents, and other relatives can either be logically allocated to their direct descendants, but in cases where these images were collected or inherited together, they can raise questions too.

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At Vintage Photo Lab we’re very experienced in managing family archives, and have encountered all manner of relational dynamics over the years. Most if not all can be addressed with the following practical approaches:
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1. Digitisation:
   The simplest solution is often to digitise all the photos. This way, both parties can have access to every image, and no one needs to lose out. According to a study by Kodak Alaris, over 1.7 trillion printed photos are estimated to be in existence worldwide, with many of these stored in photo albums, shoeboxes, and attics.
   
   What many people harbouring these photos don’t realise is that by digitising them not only can they be easily shared and passed down to the next generation, but new physical copies and albums can also be created.
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2. Dividing the Originals:
   Division of the original photos is the next thing to consider. It may be that once the photos have been categorised that it’s clear who should have what, but we’ve found that in many cases one partner is happiest to move on with the freshly digitised set alone. Alternatively, you could opt to send these original prints to the 'next in line' — such as your children — who might appreciate these heirlooms later in life.
   
   For couples who are struggling to communicate, we can also act as intermediaries, collecting the photos and ensuring both parties receive identical digital copies.
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3. Shared Cost, Shared Memories:
   The cost of digitisation and reprinting is also something that can be shared. Given the long-term value of these memories, the financial outlay is a small price to pay for peace of mind. And if disputes arise, legal professionals can often write provisions for this into your divorce settlement, ensuring that both parties contribute fairly.

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Put The Children First

Photos taken before the digital age — when each image was carefully composed and limited by the number of exposures on a roll of film — carry a weight of authenticity and nostalgia that today’s staged shots and uncannily filtered faces may not. These photos are often the only tangible links to a past that your children or grandchildren might never have witnessed. Ensuring these images are preserved, whether in digital form or as physical copies, is essential.

As you navigate your new life post-divorce, it's worth taking a moment to consider what legacy you want to leave for your children and maybe even theirs. For example, you might create a curated album for each child, containing the most meaningful images from both sides of the family.

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A Solution They’ll Appreciate

In the end, divorce doesn’t have to mean tearing up the wedding album, or any others besides. By thinking of the whole family and approaching the issue with sensitivity, practicality, and a little creativity, together we can ensure that those all-important memories are arranged in a way you’ll be happier to revisit. 

If you’re facing this dilemma — or know someone who is — know we are here to help you can move forward with minimum fuss.

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To speak with a member of the team to learn more about how we can help with your photos, contact us here.

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